"Saying nothing…sometimes says the most"

I will NEVER be as good as her.
I will never compare.
She will always be the best.
I am nothing.
I will always be jealous.
She wins. everything.

Life is a journey constantly turning down an unknown path

I wonder if guardian angels cry
When they see it all played out
And as they stand with their hands tied
Oh, do they cry out loud
It's not suppose to go like that

It's over.

:(

Called it.

I knew that would happen again.
:)
<3

You know the answer.
You will always know the answer.
You will always know the answer because the answer will never change.

I use punctuation in excess when I'm not sure where I stand.

accurate

Cross the Line If you feel you're losing the love of your life to your best friend and losing your best friend to high school.

I'm such a horrible person.

Dear John,

I just don't understand.
Less than a month ago, you promised we would stay best friends.
Then everything changed. Why does everything always have to change?
You don't treat me like a best friend. I'm barely treated like a friend half the time.
I just try to talk to you because you're the only friend I even want to talk to, but you just never seem to want to talk to me. How do you think I feel? How am I supposed to feel? Of course I'm upset; I can't help it. You promised. I thought it was real. I trusted you. Now I feel like I can't even speak to you, ever. I don't have anyone left. You were the only best friend who hadn't abandoned me, and now what do I do? I'm only fighting so hard because: You were the best best friend I had, I care about you more than anyone, and I love you.
I just want to start over. Erase the past month. I want to go back to how it used to be, before I messed up.
Please. Be my friend again. I need you. You keep me alive. You can keep me sane. You can make me happy.

You showed that you cared Or at least I thought you did...You stopped showing that you care...

i blame...

For a second, I thought you actually wanted to talk to me.
Now it just seems like you hate me again.

It's not.
You're wrong.
I have a gut feeling about this. I know I'm right.
Please. Stay.

I don't know if that actually changed anything.

I've cried everyday for more than a week.

Come back, come back, come back to me like
You could, you could if you just said you’re sorry
I know that we could work it out somehow
But if this was a movie, you’d be here right now

I feed off of attention.
I feed off of love.

I need attention, love, care, great friends, support.

I'm not getting this anymore. That's the main problem.

It just needs to end

All of it.

I can't believe I did that.
I hate myself.
I'm crying so much.
Please kill me.
I love you, I'm sorry.

Every time I talk to you now, it's a test. A test to see if you care. A test to see if you wanna stay friends.

Apparently you don't care.
Apparently you don't want to be friends.

I just edited a tumblr post 4 times in less than 5 minutes
I care too much
about
YOU

Dayum You're attractive? Have I ever told you that? No, because the only time we were together I couldn't tell you that, because I was taken, somewhat. I should've said it anyway.

I've yet to speak to you but I can tell you're a whore/slut.
And that pisses me off.

We don't have to be friends, that's up to you now.
I'd almost rather not be, but I can't live like without you.

Just stop hurting me. Try.
Please.

Back to Hello
Hello means goodbye
Why do I even try?

happy 17th birthday to me :)
I'm so thankful for all my friends <3

If it needs to be goodbye, then I guess it'll have to be, and I'll have to find a way to make it through and be okay.

I've lost everybody. I don't think I can do this. I need you.

Let's forget about the world and just let it be you and me tonight

I think last night was one of the most intense nights of my life

This hurts so much.
I hate boys.
Why do I ALWAYS get left for other girls?!
And then lied to.
I'm sick of it.
I just want you to tell me everything or our friendship is shot.
Is this goodbye?

I think they're both secretly in love with each other. and that hurts, because I'm secretly in love with him, too.

i don't count because i fell in love with you

*I kinda sorta REALLY wanna FB chat him right now...* 10 seconds later, he chats me. whoa. You know who he reminds me of? that ex that I haven't talked to in forever... they're A LOT alike.. creepy...

And when you find everything you looked for
I hope your life leads you back to my door
Oh, but if it don't, stay beautiful

No, if it wasn't for guys like you There wouldn't be songs like this

Well...
So...
If they actually take it down...I WILL CUT A BITCH.
I need my blogs to rant on gosh darnit.

And if you asked me if I love him, I'd lie. ~Taylor Swift

I need to stop falling in love so that I can stop getting my heart broken.

side-note: I should've just hooked up with that guy last night. it wouldn't have mattered now..

Guyss...........(I don't know why I said that, nobody reads this :P)
I just realised, I'm actually scared to admit that I love him. I'm scared to fall in love again. I'm scared that I'll get hurt again.

You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter,
You are the best thing that's ever been mine.

But I can't help falling in love with you

You don't know how often I want to say "I love you."

New record. F YES.

4mo 9d

At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody.

I'm the type of girl who will fall for a guy she barely knows. Who will listen to a love song & see his face. Who will look for him wherever she goes. I'm the type of girl who doesn't get over things easily. Who will beat herself up when someone doesn't love her back. Who will cry herself to sleep cause she feels she's not good enough. I'm the kind of girl who can talk to a total stranger about anything & everything, but I can't tell my best friend how much I'm hurting. I hate not being invited to parties only cause I feel so alone. I'm the kind of girl who can pick herself up, & I can switch my feelings in a minute.But I'm also the type of girl who`s strong. Who can cry her eyes out then forbid them to come back the next morning. Who will blast some old pop song & sing at the top of her lungs cause she feels like it. Who will be no one but herself.

Quiero morir

i. like. this. picture.

i. like. this. picture.
Originally uploaded by kells27

me last halloween. edited.

Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on, brah!... Lala the life goes on...

My birthday is in 1 month.
Tomorrow will not be a good day.
This weekend will also probably suck.

I've officially been single for exactly 3 months.
I haven't even been single for this long. Legit guys. This is intense.
The last time I was single for this long was when I was single for the first 14 and 5/6 years of my life.
THIS IS INSANITY.

Wondering why we bother with love, if it never lasts

Needs confidence. and happiness.

Because this one time in 6th grade.......and it didn't end well.

Dad got awkward today and asked if I would get asked to homecoming... I was honest and said probably not.
but..I'd like to be..

"I laugh at my mistakes. That's why I smile every time I see you." <---THIS. is why i love my facebook friends.

i think i'll stick to what told her earlier today..
IF....then i'll CONSIDER it...

on another note i'm gonna join operation beautiful

on yet another note, i'm not sure if anyone actually looks at this anymore besides myself, which doesn't bother me, actually it scares me because i'm not sure who, if anyone, is looking at it..

Omg, you're officially my favourite and definitely not going to become a slut.

Friday will be sad...

i hate you
i love you and all,
but
i hate you

Swear you think you cool but you not. you just obnoxious.

(i think i sound really ghetto when i say that but oh well...)

Well, tonight was...interesting.

I tell him too much but oh well I trust him because we're good friends.

"We both had hard weeks...so..yeah.."

The past. Either you miss it or you regret it. No matter what, you’ll always remember it.

You can’t have a rainbow without a little rain.

It’s easy to believe someone when they tell you exactly what you want to hear...

Tired of trying, sick of crying..Yeah i’m smiling, but inside I’m dying..

And I wonder if you ever cross my mind. For me it happens all the time...

I've been thinking about telling someone for a month.
I think I'm ready to tell you now.

I forgot how much I love this song

When I see your smile tears roll down my face...
I will never let you fall I'll stand up with you forever I'll be there for you through it all Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Think I'm going for a new approach to this whole situation starting this week. Let's see how it goes.....

ASH TREE (the Ambition) - uncommonly attractive, vivacious, impulsive, demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play with fate, can be egotistic, very reliable and trustworthy, faithful and prudent lover, sometimes brains rule over the heart, but takes partnership very seriously.

Silly Bandz... the beanie babies of the wrist

1st day of Junior year...somewhat excited, somewhat nervous, very tired.

You know you love someone when the mere thought of losing them brings you to tears.

*banging my head against a wall*

So MY favourite part of today was definitely when Katie said: "If he's anything like his brother it'll take him 8 months."
She reminds me a lot of me. and he reminds me a lot of him.
lolol. oh boy.

Oh the questions that I want to ask. But can't. Because she doesn't know I have any idea. But it's just so interesting.

I'm a bad friend.
Or maybe a good one?
Nope, probably bad.

I don't even know her anymore...

I love helping people
I love trying to make things better
I love when things are made right again

I haven't cried this hard in a long long time.

Houston, we have a problem.

Ugh. :'( uh oh.

It's ridiculous how much my parents DON'T tell me.
My best friend asks me if I'm going to my own mother's party... I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT IT. Is it like a surprise party? Cuz I haven't got a clue. DUH I'm going. Why wouldn't I?! It's probably at my freakin house!
Blah...family...

I'm creeping. on the overall group of people that i normal creep on, but not the same people as normal. xD

Why Tumblr makes me happy.

A Second chance doesn’t always mean a happy ending. Sometimes, it’s a chance to end things right.

Why am I so pathetic?! :'(

I'm gonna tell one of my best friends what I've been holding in for years...
And then I'm gonna cry myself to sleep. Because I was right, again.

Nevermind. I can't do it; not yet. I've been holding it in for half of my life. It's a slower process to finally let it out.

haha hahaha HA

*insane laughing from creeping*
It half makes me happy. It half makes me wanna cry.
So odd.
But it does make me laugh.

Please excuse my momentary sadness...:'(...

ok i'm good now...i think...

So I just did some random creeping, which made me notice how much of a creeper I was in the past too..

because

you
don't
really
care

do you
?

I love Mrs. Witcher :) she's so sweet and understanding. I feel like she's one of the parents I know that I can really talk to.

Sigh :/
I wish y'all weren't leaving. I'm gonna feel so lonely without you, both of you.

Feeling a lot better :)
I think creeping actually does help, lol.
and talking to friends:)

I feel absolutely hated.
I don't even know if that was done on purpose...but I'm afraid to find out.
and I don't know if any of them realise I'm upset with them, but they don't seem to be making any effort to fix anything, so maybe they think everything is still perfectly fine? wrong.
Again I find my best friends not realising they're hurting me.
Time to cry myself to sleep.

fuck you

p.s. if you're reading this it's not you this time, i swear.
it's someone who doesn't know this blog exists.

I have nothing to say and yet want to say soooo much

La. La. La........blah.

So my friends kinda irk me a bit sometimes. Like they don't tell me things cause they're afraid I'm gonna be mad or sad or something, but honestly if they know me well enough they should know that I always want to know and will find out. I don't care if it hurts or pisses me off I always want to know things. Learn friends learn.

La la la i'm just going to ignore that

Crap crap crap i just realised something...this could be bad

...i don't really know what to say or even think...

Why am I shocked that this book remind me of...uh, stuffs

I want to meet you.

whoa. that went so much better than i was expecting.

oh no i'm doing it again...yay..
___ ___ ___ ___ ___

:'(

f
u
c
k

y
o
u

:(

oh fuck my life. there's no chance of me passing any of my classes. i'm not even smart enough to finish my summer homework. i'm so stupid..

KILL ME! LAUREN'S HERE...

I hate ppl. You're supposed to be my best friend. Thanks..

oh no... i'm doing it again...

I kinda want to talk to her....
I feel like I could help...
I think I know how she's feeling...

Yo quiero hablar con tu... :(

Bob is officially a creeper and it's scaring me

that made me almost cry though....

I have a new found obsession with marshmallows. They make me giggle :) tehe

Even my psychologist says my life is harder than most other teenagers.
Due to this realization, I'm going to change the name of this blog..if I can..

I have so much i could say to this chick and i just might if she doesn't stop this bullshit before august

stop
ignoring
me
please

Okay i've come to the conclusion that i shouldn't owe him any money between 2 dates so i actually probably gave him more than i should've...

i just loooooooveeee when people hate me. best feeling in the world.
*sarcasm*

I feel very, very friendless

I wish I had the ability to block certain things from my memory..

Nobody slapped me like i asked, but i don't mind :D

:)

So. I have something to say.but don't feel comfortable posting it on Twitter, Tumblr, or here.so fail...

I over think things too much! Blah confusion :(

He was the only one who got multiple smiley faces... P.s. Temporarily avoiding Twitter.

“If you hurt my best friend, I can make your death look like an accident.”

there’s a story behind everything. How a picture got on a wall. How a scar got on your face. Sometimes the stories are simple, and sometimes they are hard and heartbreaking.

Flechazo

(love at first sight)

Romeo, save me, I've been feeling so alone

"It takes a minute to have a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone, but it takes a lifetime to forget someone..."

Just recently realised: “It was love at first sight.”

I'm cool...imitating how he writes on his blog posts on mine...

Boys can go die now:)

okay, you're both tools. now get over yourselves and stop calling each other that.

uhm i totally blanked out and forgot what i was going to say....grr. if i remember i'll come back. i know it had something to do with comparing them and friendships and such.

Wanna know what REALLY sucks about breakups in the long run? When you can't even listen to some of your favourite songs anymore because they make you think of that person, and you start tearing up or wanting to kill something or both. Those were some good songs; I really liked them. but one just came on; I had to change it after about 30 seconds because thoughts started rushing to my head and tears started rushing to my eyes.

Hello Blogger,
there is a reason I have returned. It's because the person I am talking about has a Tumblr and I don't want him to know I'm saying this.
You're pretty much ruining your chances of getting what you wanted out of this, us, or lack of us, or whatever.

Two weeks together, that's all it took, two weeks for me to fall for you.

and the movie just has to be Dear JOHN.

this couldn't be more ironic...

Like...I don't know how to describe this. GAH

Everyone's a Critic...

Make an effort. Show me you care. Otherwise I'll just give up...

maybe? or maybe not? no se...

According to him
I'm beautiful, incredible
He can't get me out of his head
According to him
I'm funny, irresistible
Everything he ever wanted

What happens on Spring Break '10, STAYS on Spring Break '10 ;) (just in case)

Spring is the season of love =)

Ahh life is treating me wonderfully :D

Goodbye

I have decided to stop using this because I discovered that Tumblr is much easier for me. So I won't use this unless I really need to.
Adios.

i'll be crying myself to sleep tonight for stupid reasons

didn't realise until after school that he called me around midnight...oops...

p.s. oh yeah guys suck.

I just can't do it anymore. I WANT to be single again.
Emily if you read this anytime soon, I may need your help...

How old are you?
I'm 17.
How long have you been 17?
...awhile

i can't say no to hanging out with my best friend...but after today, i just wanna be alone...especially all things considered...

Dedicated to the one
I'll always love
The one who really messed me up

I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU

and yet i love you at the same time...

oh good. i could TOTALLY use that to my advantage :) *evil thoughts*

i don't want to talk to you.i don't want to talk to you.i don't want to talk to you.

but i do. Soooooooooo much.

BLAH

DIE

:(

Today I told my secret to 4 of my close friends.

Also, I realised that 3 of my best friends are British.

For the second day in a row, I attempted to put my shampoo on my face instead of my hair...

"you 2 timing brit!" gotta love wizards of waverly place!

THANK YOU! THANK YOU! Finally, after 3 months of creeping and dreaming and wondering and waiting. I get something. Something more. Finally. I love Naomi. Good thing that I really don't care anymore. Actually really glad that it took this long.

major buzzkill.......

pretty sure i just died a little on the inside. and yet i'm smiling. what's wrong with me?

Honestly afraid of what this weekend will bring, more afraid of my creeping after this weekend. its been that 72 days now. damn. it's really been that long? doesn't seem like it, time is weird...=/ hopefully he can keep me happy all weekend.

i haven't heard from you in over 24 hours

i need to fix my creeping problems. lol.

i guess i'll just stop telling people stuff

i think that i will have to completely torture myself before this can get any better...

possibilities

Is it possible to be in love with more than one person at the same time?
Is it possible to never lose feelings for someone?
How is it possible for it to take so much longer to get over someone whom you were only with for 3 months rather than 8?!?
I'm so confuzzled.
If Emily reads this she better not say anything to anyone please. Just thoughts.
p.s. what is with me and British people?!

i'm not a creeper....
ooohhhh fuckkkkk

now what do i do

fml

alright this has GOT to stop.
someone pleaseeee slap me tomorrow.

BLEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
='(

hey
fuck
my
life

bleh
i hate ppl sometimes

"drama makes the world go around"
maybe...

apparently i can't post stuff on twitter anymore without people telling people and people freakin out

heylo to my one friend who reads this.
so i think im going to temporarily stop posting on facebook and twitter, dont worry im still alive. I did something real stupid tonight, eyes opened up, and im breaking myself off temporarily... if you read this, and anyone happens to ask, let them know.

if your saying that shit, you must not be my true friend

Crappy mood. Wanna put that on twitter but can't.